I got retweeted by Nathan Fillion!
I couldn’t believe it at first but 18 hours and 1100 notifications later I’m starting to regret it.
Technically I suppose it is my fault for tweeting him in the first place. It was ages ago and, although I can’t be 100% sure, there is a good chance that I wasn’t sober at the time.
For those that don’t know (and how could you not), Nathan Fillion is the ruggedly handsome man who plays crime writer turned detective Richard Castle, the show that I have a small but very serous obsession with. It is Murder She Wrote but sexier, if that’s even possible.
If you aren’t a fan of the murder-mystery genre aka you are under 65 you may also know Nathan from Desperate Housewives. If you are that special breed of human who is into all things sci-fi he starred on cult TV show Firefly. Going back even further he was also in Two Guys A Girl and a Pizza Place with the other man in my life, Ryan Reynolds.
By the way – that the whole thing with Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively “getting married” is just a ruse so people won’t know we’re together. Don’t tell him I told you.
Let me make it clear – my issue is not with Nathan. (Hi btw if you are reading this). My issue is with Twitter.
Here is the tweet I sent.
It isn’t the funniest tweet in the world I agree. You can tell by the attempt at wit that I had probably supped a wine or two but kudos to Nathan for the sterling reply.
I am over-the-top-total-geek thrilled that I got a retweet. If Twitter were an actual place I would go there and high five every one of my 166 followers. Then we would all go for tea because I’m British and that is what we do.
It is guaranteed that he will mention this to the scriptwriters on Castle. They’ll be all “Oh my god that girl is hilarious” and before you know it Nathan, Lena Dunham, Stephen Fry, Beyoncé and I are meeting for brunch in my Hollywood mansion just like I dreamed it.
Unfortunately, this hasn’t quite happened.
One of the unexpected side effects of being retweeted by a person with nearly 3 million followers is that I am now trapped in a “Reply All” situation with thousands of Nathan Fillion fans.
You know the disappointment you feel when you get a text and it turns out it’s the phone company? Imagine that. 1100 times. My phone has literally not stopped. As an added bonus each retweet also comes with its own email – score!
I wouldn’t mind except the compliments they are paying him are starting to make me jealous.
“Nathan you make me smile.”
“Nathan I hope you’re having a great day”
“I like you in Desperate Housewives”
Lovely things, sure, but the egomaniac in me feels I should at least get a look in. I have nice eyes and great acting skills too you know!* (*views author’s own)
Some of the people commenting are a few grapes short of a Merlot.
“Nathan please tweet me, I’m scared I have a demon cat”
Very Fatal Attraction.
This is clearly the highlight of my year and will come second only to the day I get a hug from Angela Lansbury. That said, somewhere buried in these tweets are things that are really important to me such as the fabulous people at 12 Most deciding to print my article and people I admire actually reading it!
Every time I tried to find the retweet on my article I got bombarded with 200 more marriage proposals – and they weren’t even for me!
“Hey Twitter – Nathan Fillion is rich and famous. He’s fine. Would it kill you to ask how I’m doing?”
My unusual predicament only solidifies my belief that the person who thought of the “retweet” and “reply all” function is an evil genius.
I know all too well that gut wrenching feeling when you send a hungover email to a pal and receive a response from your boss politely declining your invitation to “eat the world” at Macdonald’s this lunchtime as she has a tele con with the Singapore office.
It could be worse.
This week a Professor at University College London accidentally forwarded an email inexplicably with the word “bello!” and unbeknownst to him CC’d in every single student at the university. Students being the kind and caring people they are, launched on this with hilarious results and #bellogate was born. They signed everyone at the university up to online porn sites, the Sarah Palin supporters site and, most shocking of all, Coldplay’s email list.
But, back to me. In case you missed it here is the tweet I was talking about
How amazing is that!
Full of confidence I have decided to jump on Nathan Fillion’s browncoat and use this sudden attention to my advantage. This is where you come in.
Yes – Dear Reader I need your help.
Don’t panic, I’m not asking for a kidney or anything (yet).
You see these awards are actual awards. Entered into by people with longstanding internet connections and the ability to copy and paste on a Mac without Googling it first. Writers who actually write about serious things, thought provoking articles on poverty, feminism and politics.
I am under no illusions that my little SSW can compete with the likes of them, but I will never have this much attention on my twitter feed ever again, so now seems as good a time as any to beg for votes.
I have been entered into the individual Lifestyle and Most Innovative categories. I’m not 100% sure what Most Innovative means but there wasn’t a category for “ambitious overeater writes crap about things” and I panicked.
Dear Reader you are hereby invited to vote your arse off for me in these awards.
Public voting opens on 10th November to 1st December. This seems like forever away but I wanted to give you plenty of warning. I know you are really busy over the next few weeks – you have that thing this weekend and then you have to go visit that person.
Nathan if you are still reading this. Thanks for the support.
To the rest of you – I might not have 3 million followers, a hit TV show and the ability to do that thing when you wiggle your hair so it looks like you’re wearing a wig. But I have you, Dear Reader, and that means more to me than all the twitter followers in all the world.
Sorry, that was an obscure Castle reference. If you do follow me on twitter I hope that you like me for me, and not for my celebrity connections – I think I’ve got carried away.
Maybe one day I’ll be more famous than Nathan Fillion and can exact my sweet sweet revenge. Until then, if you don’t follow me, please do. I lied before, I actually need all the followers I can get.
Keep your eyes peeled for more details on Blog Awards UK 2015!